![]() That sort of thing.” I fidget with the hem of my skirt. That he misses home but is doing okay at basic training. “I had a letter from Diego before I left.” I blink away the tears that are trying to gather. (Description or emotion can work too.) Beats replacing tags looks like this, again from Within These Lines: Tip #5 Use beats instead of tags.Īs talked about in this post Action Beats Versus Dialogue Tags, tags are things like he said, she exclaimed, and action beats are a sentence of action that accompanies dialogue. ![]() I cannot decide which detail is the most shocking as I stand in the administration building at Manzanar War Relocation Center and stare out the window.įor that scene, I saw that I could use description for dramatic effect, and I really like how it turned out. The soaring beauty of the Sierras overlooking all the ugly dustiness of this prison. The echo of hammering as another guard tower is erected. Tall fences with five strands of barbed wire snaking around the top. I did this in Within These Lines when Evalina goes to the concentration camp for the first time. Now, there are times when you want to slow down the pacing to set the stage clearly for the reader. Tip #4 Only pause to describe something important. Now, I’m not sure I can totally prove to you that doing this will prevent the specific problem we’re talking about today (description slowing down your story) but I think it’s worth putting on this list all the same. If I’m struggling to see a setting clearly, I like to make myself write down what my character can see, feel, hear, smell, and taste. Sometimes what we choose to describe lacks dimension because we’re relying on the same senses all the time. Tip #3 Incorporate all the senses into each scene, not just sight and sound. If, at the end of your scene, the character is going to throw up all over a very expensive living room rug, you want to make sure to mention said rug in the beginning. We also want to make sure we pick important details to describe. Jill refers to these as character “tags.” Describing a character as talking too loud or having three eyebrow rings is much more helpful to a reader than “brown hair and brown eyes.” Or with character descriptions, it’s really helpful for readers if you give characters a feature that makes them memorable. Noting that he has a complete set of Jane Austen novels is even better. This mostly works well if we’re describing somebody or somebody’s property.įor example, noting that the character’s alpha male boss has a full bookshelf in his living room is fine. When it’s appropriate, I like to find something that shows a bit of characterization or quirk. ![]() The biggest challenge here is often thinking up interesting things. Tip #2 Pick interesting things to describe.Īlong with using specific language, showing your reader interesting places, items, and features will keep your story from feeling bogged down with trivial details. Instead, that specific detail could’ve been handed out initially and we wouldn’t have to clunk up the story with two mentions. If we say she comes in and smells dinner cooking, then a little later when she’s in the kitchen, we might learn that it’s marinara. Let’s go back to our character who just came home. Getting as specific as possible with our language minimizes how long we have to pause to describe. Instead, she smells marinara sauce simmering on the stove. Using specific nouns and verbs means your character doesn’t walk in the door and smell dinner cooking. ![]() One of the quickest ways to tighten your prose and your description all at the same time is to make sure you’re using the best words, especially nouns and verbs. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |